Christmas – the bitter sweet cocktail

From the extreme of saccharine sweet sentimental supermarket TV ads through to the other extreme telling us of the misery and loneliness many less fortunate than us will suffer this Christmas… Christmas is often portrayed as a tale of two halves. But in reality, most of us lie somewhere in the middle of these two extremes.

Because there is so much pressure on us to enjoy our general material comfort and indulgence at Christmas, we either push away our less positive emotions or shy away from the complex emotions Christmas may stir up for us. Some of these complex emotions may look like this:

  • We may be generally satisfied with our life, but Christmas may stir up regrets about how our life could / ‘should’ have been  - the loves we have lost or never had, the family and friends we may like to be with us who are lost to us through death, illness or family fights, or even just a less dramatic fading away over the years.
  • Though we probably quite like not working for a few days over the festive season, this work down time may  quickly lead us to realise how effective work can be at covering up and masking our underlying anxieties about life, relationships, and the future – and the gaps we see in these.
  • Christmas may see us happily clinking our glasses with the rest of them, but we may still have a niggling doubt that perhaps we are drinking and have been drinking more than those around us for a while now and asking ourselves whether it could be a problem we should deal with?
  • Our Christmas mask may work pretty well for us, but we may realise in our hearts that we don’t want next Christmas to be like this and we are wondering where and how to start making the seemingly overwhelming changes that need to be made in our life.
  • We may love the people we are with – for about 2.5 hours, then we may wish to escape to an outer corner of the Universe where it is peaceful and quiet. We wonder if this really is our tribe.

This is just a few permutations of a possibility of millions we may find ourselves in individually. Christmas stirs these things up in us – it is natural and human. Often these thoughts are musings and will pass with the season. But sometimes they linger when the season passes. Sometimes they need a bit more care and attention  - and a counsellor to help us clarify and sort them out and help you untangle them – and sort out what you might want to do next to find the fulfilling life to which we are ell entitled.

Sometimes these thoughts and musings that linger may result in anxiety and depression that could do with some hep.

If you feel you could do with some help, then I would love to hear from you – contact me so we can start our conversation.

Leave a Comment